Lim Peh's countdown of the week ( maybe year)

LPSC may not sound as shitty dirty brutal trash as it is
LPSC can also stand for
1) Louisiana Public Service Commission
2) Liverpool Plains Shire Council
3) Liquid Propulsion Systems Centre
4) London Practical Shooting Club
5) Loretta Paganini School of Cooking
6) Lunar and Planetary Science Conference
7) Lewis Proton Shielding Code

Wa lau eh so much LPSC existed already??? guess we have to think of new creative terms liao =(

sorry for the delay response

the reason why we didnt post any articles for 4 months is mainly because we didnt know the new account. But somebody finally, just, suddenly, miraculously found out that all the usernames of big cock , undies , turkey man and lim peh will be under the LPSC.co@gmail.com . so u guys please login using the gmail instead of ur crappy usernames.

also wanna thank the readers who post tasteless, vague," one word " comments in the tagboard , we appreciate ur patience and believe in LPSC.

stay tune for the new cockcast ( although i don't know what it is about ) as promised by turkeyman soon , i hope ......................... ..................

LIM PEI is back from vacation !!

and realise that big cock , undies and turkeyman are not doing their jobs in LPSC!!!!!! what the fish is going on dudes !!! why stop ??? dont let our fellow fans and friends down after all the trouble of creating a blog with such a long name ! cmon fellows , wake ur bleeding ass up!!




ok ok i will start the ball rolling ........... by writing a letter to my brother santa

DEAR Santa CLaUS ,

how are u , i am fine. hope u rmbr lim peh and u still owe me $50 from me last yr to buy 4D in s'pore. lim peh ka le kong, dun think i rich ok? $ 50 still ,money leh!!! pls return ASAP when u fly here . I went everywhere on Xmas to find u leh from paris to berlin . Taipei to Beijing . dunno why evry Xmas looks the same to me. everytime go to my old folks home got volunteer come visit us like we old man very pathetic like . not to mention someone dressing up like u with the heavy thick cotton red cloth over his oversized unrealistic always fatty belly. where u buy the belt that fit ur waist eh? lim peh want to buy one for Miss V hehe . then Lim pei always get turkey and all sorts of crappy log cakes for xmas dinner . evry yr eat turkey , talk cock with people. on xmas . SIANZ.

i hope u understand my powderfulll England for i gotta warn u about coming here should decide to return my money

1) the gahmen
2) sarong party girls suspiciously near u
3) GST cheats
4) excessively decorated xmas trees that may blind ur ageing eyes haha
5) the formidable giant Miss V
6) 4 mill. ppl smiling at u for no whatsoever reason .
7) ur raindeer might land on esplanade aka durian shell
8) no chimney for u to sneak in soz
9) naughty chew-ren who will call u AH PUEY hehe
10) last but not least
AFTER EVERYTHING pls GET OUT OF MY " elite and uncaring face" pls

and i wish myself a happy new year . right a happy one . i think so.......................

DON't Beat around the BUSH!!

today, President of USA , BUSH, visit S'pore . Today, i just realised that GST increase by 007% next year. TOday, I saw the the the CAsino royale 007 advertisement. WOW so much things happen during the O week . how come lim peh donch know??? i also donch know why.

but nebermind nah., the most importing is wondering where the extra 2% og GST ( ""good"" service tax? ) goes. does it really help the begga... i mean low income people???? OR is it to mark the new 007 movie with 007 % GST???

hmmmmmm . I suspect that the money may be hidden in a tunnel behind my toilet. just like there is a tunnel behind the cell in PRISON BREAK . So I go for another adventure .


day1
to remove a toilet bowl, i need to unscrew the screw , to unscrew i need a screwdriver. where can i find a decent SCrewdriver? hmmmm.................... i feel so screwed up.

day 2
i made a screwdriver by stealing a screwdriver from the construction site nearby. Made In China . don't know strong or not. nebermind lah. a lot of things also made in China. China also developing a lot. so quality should be good.

day 3
i started unscrewing my screwed screw . hoping that the haze and S'poreans' heck care attitude will cover my secret mission and overcome the gahmen's "Foresight " . they cant even takle the haze!

GREAT !!! toilet bowl removed! .............. no tunnel found. mission failed . GREAT. NOW I HAVE TO START FIXING THE TOILET BOWL BACK AGAIN.!!!!!! STUPID PRESON BREAK TEACH WRONG STUFF . I WILL NEBER TRUST THE MEDIA AGAIN EVER.

BUT !!! maybe i can learn a thing or two in CASINO ROYALEEEEEEEEEEEEE..........

wha i write so long ?

Courts to review on sentencing guidelines

the Cock of justice wants to strike balance on punishing and rehabilitating offenders. it says " ...should hand down appropriate penalties, reform the criminal and reintegrate him to society" .

Offenders to be integrated must be minor such as spitting on a white man , destroying vandalism evidence, dirtying a pee aae pee white shirt , stealing money from charity funds, suicidal intention by buying Subutex. etc
Offenders must also have at least a N level cert, score
more than 20 points in L1R5 and been dropouts from 10 schools . ( not including Independence schools)

Instead of being punished, offenders will go through painful and long rehabilitation that will keep them from rotting in prison.
" Now , offenders can no longer be kept in jail, they shit around , crap a lot and F**** ing show attitude even after released." one of the officers said. " Thus, we should not only punish the offenders but to "rehabilitate " them as well "

Offenders can also now choose to go through a gruelling Survivor-like series of training in Pulau Ubin and other islands to have a taste of new prison life by the sea.

Rumours have it that the prisoners are not allowed to watch television recently ,especially after the opening of the new show " PRISON BREAK" .

Some prisons even increase their security level from a puny security camera to highly sensitive camera that can track down the movement of any individual with tattoo or piercings . " this new security can help to prevent anyone from escaping or saving his brother in prison.

Prisoners must also learn new skills while serving their sentence .
New courses available are:
Tattoo art ---- their favourite
piercing
Complete Idiot guide to obeying the law
boxing
licking
swallowing
advertising for products -- for 7-11 , NTUC, Giant, Isetan
advertising for campaignes --- No smoking, No Drug , No Fishing.



And most importantly , ...........SINGING.. so that they can reintegrate to society . see the link?? People tend to accept those who can sing and will go crazy about singers .. just like how Singapore Idol make telephone companies rich .

Quote : An apple a day keeps a doctor away , if the doctor is chio , throw the apple away .
If the doctor is gay , eat 2 apples a day.
GGG , 2080

NEW 7-11 EMBASSADOR NAMED!!!!SINGAPORE IDOL NAMED!!!!!!! like i bloody hell care.


yah yah yah. hady wins. so what...its not like the world is going to achieve peace or something. just another dodo who gets famous for like 2 weeks and then dies down............WHO THEN RESORTS TO BLOODY 7-11 ADVERTISTMENTS TO PROMOTE YOURSELF!!!!
i bet you all have seen the 7-11 ad. its like this kid who was trying to bloody get a surpee to drink, but then taufica batusa grabs his cup to sign!!!


i bet the jonathan fans must be really really sad man... its like:

JON fan :"i've voted 287 times for you and spent my life long savings including my insurance and my coffin money also, why you never win?? why?? "

BIGc0ck:"thats because you are an idiot, you maniac."



what i really miss is JOAKIM. that clown really cracks me up man. holding his mike like hes looking into some gay telescope, and trying to 'please' his fans with his wierd singing. whats best about him, is his DIE HARD JOAKIM FANS. even like 10 million episodes after joakim is out they will still be wasting their 60cents typing useless shit messages and polluting the t.v screen.

bimbotic joakim fan 1: " joakim i miss you. you are so handsome. please come back"
bimbotic joakim fan 2 : "joakim....i so sad.....i like your singing........"

BIGc0ck: "_\_"

i also found a joakim album on the floor at geylang. it reads......


JOAKIM GOMEZZZ, niece of james gomezzz(the -Pee Aae Pee- one)

album name: I LOVE WANTONS

songs:
1) i sing bad
2)i sing badder
3)i sing baddest
4)i sing badder than baddest
5)my bimbotic fans
6)my dads an ang moh
7)i'm jealous of the janitor who sings better than me
8)WANTONS are my GAME

Announcement .

DEserted forum drying up, but replenishing .

. to all readers , are you curious about how birds fly? do you wanna know why gays are homo? Do you know the secret to genetically modified underwears? here is what lim peh found for your doubts. Bio forum ( started last yr deserted last yr founded by Mr aurl ) can answer all your stupid nonsense. just visit http://groups.msn.com/unitybioLim peh will be there to help lost desert camel ,...see yah thats one thing to do this weekend of u are not happy with your bio results . HO She BO

LETS GEMS; Go Eat My Shai!
“Oi, uncle, 1 chicken chop”
“Nah, $5 pls. “

“Huh? Why the chop so small today? Last time I buy the chop is bigger”

“Oh, no choice lah. Now got the IMF so must save the bigger chops for bigger guests. “

“ IMF ? ”
“ haven’t you heard ?? that one leh. got a lot of rich men and women coming to s’pore. the one locals call “ International Massive Freaks” ….. some more , less people want to eat western food now because PM Lee said “ Mee Siam Mai hum” so everyone want to eat Mee Siam with cockles . That PM Lee also damn creative siah. Mee Siam where got hum? Now, the Muslim food stall , rich like hell . you see the Indian food stall opposite? ever since the movie “ the Devil wears Prada ” now people think the devil eats prata. Now, Raju change hand phone more often than before lor. What a great investment”

LIKE I CARE! this guy is damn long winded and irritating. Not to mention that he tortured lim peh ‘s ears with his speech. Unfortunately, he was not the only one who is not happy with providing services. Many other service providers just frown too much. Mr Awanna Maney from Food Agriculture Congress -Union ( FAC-U) said “ so you see , people are too tired to give u pathetic fools a damn smile. They are saving energy to serve IMF people. Now get the hell out of here! ”

Even the old hag ,who specialized in photocopy worksheets, practice that.
LIM PEH
“ Oi women , 1 paper 2 sets .”

“ …………~,~ ……………………….zap………….zap………..zap………….zap”

“……………~,~………………..$1.53” LIFE STINKS

Rich Teacher
“ hey, 1 paper 46 sets”
“OKAY! NO PROBLEM!!! ZAP ZAP ZAP
HERE $90.54 PLEASE~! THANK YOU VERY MUCH PLEASE COME BACK AGAIN!”
You can almost see her eyes popped out and that rare smile. Sometimes, I wonder whether machines are more polite than us.


" wow ! everyone looks so happy! "

"thats because all the grumpy and defiant ass clowns are killed in the 1964 riots "

NEWER THAN THE NEW THEME SONG!!!!!!!! EXTENDED VERSION!!!!!!!! NEW NEW NEW NEW NEW NEW NEW NEW NEW NEW NEW NEW NEW!!!!

LPSC ROCK THEME SONG


this song is featuring rugger.....AND IT ROCK ROCK ROCK! ok i think it rocks la. Don't know if you think so too. We recorded it at geylang Studios because the rates was cheapest there....so the quality is a bit screwed up. enjoy=)]

BTW, the new name for LPSC band is called......LP. not linkin park, not lim pei. it is...LADIES PRIORITY..yeah
vocalist - Rugger/ Turkeyman
Guitarist - Bigc0ck
drummer - Turkeyman
bass- THE PEANUT

yooo...my apologies for not posting for so long...as you can see exams are near......


but just for your information, the LPSC crew have been coming up with new songs and stuff, and are in the process of making the songs...so TAKE NOTE =)


some of the songs in mind.....

1) Kaycee Chan (parody of Stacy's mom)
2)HX movie(currently unamed/i'm not sure of it) sound track
3)LPSC theme song (chinese ochestra, punk rock, indian style and MORE)



so stay tuned........................

Celebration a fiasco

"oi why are u back !!@#%$^@$ " shouted lim pei

" yah lor , what u want!? " said the 2 birds, BigC0ck and turkeyman

" hey where's my kopi-O? " , asked undies.

a sudden breeze of coldness filled the air .................................. brrrrrr

"I cant see mars !! " cried GGG -------------* refer to july archives for more on GGG*

ALAMAK! bloody heaven!!! No Mars means that GGG stays for another thousand year. Grrrrr
" bohohohoho.................. sobx sobx.... No Mars ! Ramly lied us ! " cried GGG .

yah lor , ramly lied everyone leh, wahhh first time hear teacher lie seh . i neber thought that teachers have any sense of humour. MUST celebrate thiss in 31 August siah .
so no mars, lim peh didnt see any red ball up the sky so high like a balloon in the sky.
what a shameful way to see my money burn in the party .
so good news or BAD news, GGG is here to stay. bloody hell ....... sigh..

And yes operation NEW Horizon is true and happening , undergarments . NASA has sent a robot to Pluto to take pictures of everything there including Mr Kuiper's belt. sicko perverts are the NASA u might say .